Why We Absolutely Love the Pretty Woman Movie

Many people I know … including some you would find quite surprising … LOVE the movie Pretty Woman.

Why is that?

There are many answers to that question, so I will share  a few of my thoughts about it here.

As someone on my Facebook wall said after I posted about the 25th Pretty Woman Anniversary reunion coming up, that its just an “obvious formula,” so why all the fuss?

A few of the obvious reasons include:

  • A fun script brilliantly acted and directed
  • Gorgeous leading male and female actors
  • Some truly interesting and odd characters that you love, or love to hate
  • Believable chemistry between the two main actors
  • A fairy tale that ends with happily ever after
  • Lavish environments that many people find highly appealing
  • Great clothes and shopping
  • Lots of humor

I am of the firm opinion that there is much more going on though, and that that is the reason for its huge appeal.

Its not just a knight in shining armor story about the gallant prince coming to rescue the damsel in distress who has fallen on hard times.

Its a LOT more than that.

Twenty years ago when I first woke up spiritually, the words that kept burning in my brain were “I’m here to help people discover the beautiful, powerful, magnificent beings they are inside.” That is what the whole movie is about.

The story, beyond the romance, the jet set lifestyle, the rags vs riches contrast,  the adversity of “friends” who don’t approve, is about the empowerment of the Vivian character, played by Julia Roberts.

Vivian is a beautiful, intelligent, competent, humorous, and interesting woman that for whatever reason has never seen herself that way.  Most women I know are like that. And the ones who have succeeded, in any area of their life, had a whole lot of caca to overcome in order to do so.

Religion says we are lesser than. Business is often an “old boys network.” Men often play a much bigger role in politics. These are just a few of the places we pick up that we are defective. We are taught that we are weaker and probably not as good at math and science as our male counterparts.  (So of course I had to go out and become an engineer just to prove something – LOL) This is just the crap women are fed from the moment they are born about what it means to be a woman.

Then there is the constant comparing of our looks with who ever is in the movies, in the magazines, the Sports Illustrated swim suit edition, etc. Heaven forbid if a woman was dumped for another woman by someone they loved. Wow does that one cause damage. Multiply that damage x 10 or more if it was a husband. What a woman is taught about herself at home, at school, with her peers, even with her enemies, can be hugely damaging to a woman’s self esteem. And without that, she loses before she even engages in the game.

In the Cinderella story, Cinderella knew she was a Princess being mistreated by an evil step mother and was given an opportunity to change that. But after the dance, Cinderella ran home and the rest was left up to Prince Charming. Cinderella didn’t undergo a true metamorphosis. She really only changed clothes.

But in the Vivian story, when she began to glimpse that she had value, that she had gifts, that this great guy actually saw her brilliance … well then  that girl began to really shine. Because truly, in many cases, all it really takes is one person who actually loves, honors, accepts, and appreciates you for who you are, that can see your brilliance, that can see your unique gifts and how special you are, to open the doorway to you turning your whole life around.

And once she began to “get” that she was more than she had been believing or pretending to herself, then she decided to become that person and demand the respect that came along with feeling good about who you are. She decided to enroll in a beauty course – finding some new career to get her out of the surroundings and “career” she was currently in and head off into a bold new reality.

And, along the way, she said those magic words, “I want the fairy tale.”

Well don’t we all?

Don’t we all truly want love, wealth, health, a fun lifestyle, to be truly happy and surrounded by wonderful people?

We all know the answer to that question.

She had no idea if Edward, played by Richard Gere, would also step up to being more than he had been previously, or if their time truly was over. She would figure out a way to get over it if he couldn’t step into his brilliance too!

She stood up for what she felt she finally deserved, and then Edward showed up as the Knight in Shining Armor she knew he could be.

Its a beautiful tale and even thinking about it brings tears.

Because it touches deep within the soul of those who allow it to, to let you hope and dream and believe in brilliant possibilities for yourself as well.

 

Return from the Why We Absolutely Love the Pretty Woman Movie Page to the Magnificent U Personal Empowerment Home Page

 

Leading with Your Heart and Not Your Mind – Firewalking for Empowerment

Fire Walking for a Cause by Takara

I remember the time I walked on fire.

Now some people think about walking on fire and say, “So what?” because it is no big deal. Others look at you like you must be nuts – not being able to imagine doing it and wondering why anyone would want to.

I always fell into the first category. When I first heard about firewalking, I knew it was something I could do with little to no effort and certainly no cause for getting all bent out of shape. So I never intended to do it. I had nothing to prove and it didn’t feel like some challenge I needed to overcome.

But … Read more

Dealing with the Killer Called Stress by Captain Paul Watson

Dealing with the Killer Called Stress

Observations and Advice by Captain Paul Watson (by permission)

I am often asked how I deal with stress considering I’m wanted by Japan and Costa Rica, I have a price on my head from the shark fin mafia of Costa Rica, we have numerous ships on the sea in dangerous campaigns, I am being sued, threatened and harassed continuously and I have a lot of enemies, critics and people who wish me harm.

The answer to this is simple. I don’t deal with stress, because I do not suffer from stress. And these are ten primary reasons why, and for anyone suffering from anxiety, worry or stress, I would like to offer this advice …

1. It is what it is. Whatever the issue, whatever the threat, whatever the circumstances it simply is what it is. Stressing will not change the situation. All problems can be dealt with or ignored.

2. “It’s always something.” I say this all the time to my crews whenever a problem arises. “It’s always something and if it’s not something, it’s something else, but it is always something.” This means that life comes with obstacles, challenges and problems. Problems should not be unexpected. They are inevitable. All problems can be dealt with by dealing with them, delegating someone else to deal with them, or ignoring them. One thing for sure, on a ship, it is definitely always something.

3. Stay calm. There really is nothing worth getting upset about. For example, if I drop a bottle of wine or tomato sauce and it shatters, my reaction is, “hmmm okay, that needs cleaning up.” If I lose my phone, wallet or keys, my reaction is “I better replace what I lost and take measures to cancel my cards etc. More seriously when my regulator jammed once at 30 meters, I calmly signaled my partner to indicate my situation. Fretting about it will not recover the object. Panicking will not save your life. Anger emanates from stress. Without stress there can be no anger. Without stress there is no panic.

4. Nothing material is permanent and thus objects are not worth stressing about. Your car is damaged, something you own is stolen, or you lost your investments etc. It is really not important. Material objects and comforts are nice but they should not be anchors keeping you attached to stress. Move on.

5. Friends are friends or they are not. A true friend will never betray you and if a “friend” does betray you than he/she is simply not a friend. Always walk away from betrayal and do not stress about it. True and loyal friends are rare treasures and should be treated as such. Loyalty returns loyalty. Compassion returns compassion. Courage returns courage. However you control only your own loyalty, compassion and courage, not that of others. And if they prove disloyal or they betray you, the treasure is no longer a treasure but merely a bauble to be tossed aside. Never stress about betrayal or loss. It is what it is.

6. Loneliness is an opportunity. It is an opportunity to discover yourself. You can’t find someone to love you if you don’t love yourself, and the secret to finding the right person is to not look for that person. Love should blossom from the ground like a lovely wild flower. It cannot be cultivated until after it is realized. Do not seek the seed but let the flower reveal an opportunity to you to grow and learn.

7. Relationships are like streams, constantly flowing and as they flow they meet obstacles. Some are minor and others major but a relationship either flows around the obstacle or it is blocked, and if permanently blocked, it ends. This is not cause for stress or angry, resentment or jealously. It is what it is. Move on with appreciation and without bitterness for the relationship that is no more, and open your heart to other possibilities that life presents. The most important factor in maintaining a meaningful relationship with lovers, family or friends is simply acceptance. You need to accept them for who they are and they need to accept you for who you are. If you cannot accept another person for who they are, you need to stop inflicting stress on that person and to walk away. And if another person does not accept you for who you are, you need to walk away no matter the nature of the relationship. Stress kills and living with a person who does not accept you for who you are is like living with a person who is slowly killing you.

8. Fear is a poison that seeps into the soul and paralyzes our senses generating paranoia, insecurity and anger. Never let fear enter your life. There is really nothing to fear because things are what they are and will be what they will be. Remember you are the captain of your fate and the master of your soul and body. Who you are and what you wish to be depends on you and you alone. A person free of fear can accomplish far more than a person shackled to fear.

9. Oscar Wilde once said that the only thing worst than being talked about was not being talked about. People talk, they gossip, they make false accusations, some enjoy insulting and belittling others. They are easily dealt with by ignoring them. Responding to them is what they want, so don’t respond. Reacting to them is what they want, so don’t react. Such people are not worthy of causing stress to you. They come from a place of insecurity, jealously and fear. It is their stress, and their stress is their problem. It should not be yours.
10. Hoka Hey. It’s a good day to die. It’s a Lakota saying and it means to not fear death and to stand firm for what you believe in, to fight against all odds and to never surrender. The one absolute of life is death. We all will die. What matters is not dying but living. It is how you live that is important and the only thing important about dying is how you die. It should be a death without fear, with dignity and with acceptance that it is what it is. The person without fear dies but once, the person shackled by fear dies slowly from stress and anxiety. Accept the inevitable, embrace the final reality of life and smile in the face of the infinite. The real secret to happiness is to not fear your own death, to not fear failure or ridicule, and not to fear others.

Stress is an obstacle to mindfulness and an impediment to impeccability. Stress is the cause of migraines, cancer and many other ailments. It is the reason people smoke, take drugs, and drink excessively. When people ask me why I’ve never smoked anything, the reason being is that I have never felt inclined to do so. It never seemed healthy to me and I have always been mindful of the consequences. I think that stress blocks mindfulness of consequences. The same holds true to getting drunk or stoned. Without stress there is no need, nor a desire to do either.

Mindfulness is simply awareness of who you are and what you are doing. A person who is mindful is a person free of stress.

Unfulfilled desire leads to stress. Wanting nothing allows you to appreciate what you have. When you want nothing, you want for nothing. We all have basic needs for food, for warmth and shelter, for clothing and for companionship. Mindfulness allows you to be secure with your basic needs. Everything else is a luxury and although luxuries may be appreciated, you should not depend upon them. Depending upon luxuries leads to stress.

I have never worked a day in my life for the sole purpose of making money. I have never wanted to own anything and although I now do own property and material things, I do not allow those things to own me. I never engage in arguments about money or debts. I tend to avoid debts but when debts occur my position is that they are what they are and certainly not anything to be troubled with.

As far as basic needs, I learned to address this as a teenager when I left home at 15. I had no money, no place to stay, no prospects. I jumped a freight train, rode in the automobiles being transported from Toronto all the way to Vancouver. I arrived and camped in the abandoned gun towers on Wreck Beach and the first thing I did was to go to Vancouver City College to enroll. I found a job, moved out of the gun tower into a single room I rented and went from there. Looking back I see it as an adventure. I had nothing but there was no stress. I simply replaced the insecurity of my position into an adventurous experience. I treated every job as a learning experience and working as a longshoreman, teamster, tree planter, warehouse man, short order cook, baker, painter, carpet layer, postman, tour guide, landscaper, and seaman all were educational experiences.

The truth is that all of life is an adventure, the good and the bad, the ups and the downs, the experiences, the hardships, the thrills and the times that were lonely, happy or difficult. Even the loss of friends and family is simply dealt with by acknowledging that death is as it is. It is inevitable and although we may sincerely mourn we can do so without being stressed. This may be difficult to understand but it is indeed quite possible. With the passing of every friend, with the passing of my brother I have silently said “Good-bye” with the appreciation of having known them.

I have gone into situations many times where the risks of injury, death or imprisonment were practically a certainty. My approach has always been acceptance. And amazingly I am still alive and still free. When I have had nothing I have had everything I need, and when I have risked all, I have usually been successful. One of the things that concerns me is when I read about, or hear of people, especially young people committing suicide because of bullying. I wish that I could talk to such people before they make such a terminal decision. I would tell them to not let the insecurities and fears of others influence them in any way. I would tell them to accept that all the ridicule, insults, bullying and peer pressure is irrelevant and simply unimportant to who they are. If a parent is unaccepting of who you are, you need to say to them that if you are unacceptable to them they have no right to be your parent and you should walk away from them. Too many people are enslaved to parents, partners and friends who do not accept them Unacceptance and bullying are forms of violence and everyone should walk away from violence with dignity. No one should tell you what to believe, how to think, how to dress, how to behave or to dictate your sexual orientation or condemn you for your compassion, your passion, your imagination and your character. You are who you are and that is what it is, and how it should be, and if others do not tolerate who you are, don’t give them the satisfaction of destroying you. Simply symbolically spit in their eye, walk away and concentrate on being who you are for the benefit of yourself.

And if anyone is inclined to commit suicide my advice is to commit social suicide instead. That is, to drop out of your life as it is and begin another life, in another place with new ideas. Adventure is the antidote for depression. Take a chance, jump into the unknown and you will be amazed at what is awaiting you after you do.

I am not infallible. I have made mistakes in my life, many of them. I have at times in the past responded with anger although never physical and limited to the poison of the pen. I have let some people down, disappointed others and missed opportunities. But the one thing that I have been able to do in my life is to avoid stress.

At 64, I am healthy, happy, optimistic, and as passionate as I ever have been. Even more so because I have had the grace of experience and the satisfaction of achievement in those areas that I chose to address.

The point of this posting is this: Do not let stress ruin your health, your love or your life. Dreadnaught and live the adventure, this adventure that is life. It may well be the only life you will ever have. Even if you believe in the afterlife (oh and don’t stress about that either) the fact is you will never know for sure, so no sense wasting the unique life that you have.

A stress free life is not only possible, it’s also essential for your health and your happiness.

Captain Paul Watson is head of Sea Shepherd Conservation Society. He has been defending oceans and sea life for many years.  You may have seen him on Whale Wars: http://www.animalplanet.com/tv-shows/whale-wars/.  To find out more about Sea Shepherd, visit this link: http://www.seashepherd.org/

Energy Vampires and the Stench of Pretend Spiritual Guru’s

Pretend Spiritual Gurus and Energy Vampires

Latest Revision: 12/19/15

Just because someone is considered a spiritual guru, shaman, or medicine man (woman), does not make them automatically someone to be trusted or sought out for healing and advice. Energy vampires and pretend spiritual gurus are much more common than most people think.

Money Pyramid Schemes

My friend, Ilona Selke, shared the following words on Facebook (shared here with permission):

“Money Pyramid Schemes … They have been traveling the alternative circles for decades…and I would like to post this as it puts the feelings a lot of people have at the bottom of such pyramid schemes.

To blame the elders for not doing the research? Usually no one wants to listen… I have shared my views…but in then..whether it is about the ‘woman’s circle’ or even on not picking bad guys, lessons seem to have to be learned. Advice seems to work on those that almost have the wisdom already.
But there is a good thing: “Lessons learned are like bridges burnt you only have to cross them but once.” (hopefully)”

She shared that along with an article by a woman that had been “taken in” by the Women’s Circle Pyramid Scheme.

These are my thoughts on this topic … Read more

Quote About Anger by Debbie Takara Shelor

Quote by Debbie Takara Shelor

 

“The anger, judgment, and hatred you feel is not God. It is your ego. It is your fear, limiting beliefs, and lack of love for self and others that you are expressing. It is all the unhealed places within wishing to be illuminated, healed, and forgiven. The demons are not outside of you. They are within.” ~ Debbie Takara Shelor

Quote by Bestselling Author Debbie Takara Shelor about Anger and Judgment

A quote I encourage you to ponder and think upon whenever you find yourself angry or judging another. This includes politicians, countries, and things in the news.

Have a deLightful day,

 

 

Alan Watts on Awakening with a Fabulous Video

So many wonderful videos are coming out now about enlightenment, our deep connection with the environment, and so much more.

This is a powerful speech given by Alan Watts. The video was created by Tragedy and Hope who used the audio by permission of alanwatts.org.

The speech, all by itself, is truly profound. With the visuals, it adds another depth of meaning and understanding.

I trust you will enjoy this invitation and explanation of awakening.


Enjoy,

Bestselling author Debbie Takara Shelor signature

Beloved by Debbie Takara Shelor

Beloved by Takara

How much do you love yourself?

What do you feel worthy of receiving?

The Goddess is rising and she demands honor, respect, and acknowledgement for her contribution.

I’m sure you have been seeing it too. Many of the women I know have been faced recently with a strong desire to dump their boyfriends/husbands. And for the one’s I’ve spoken with, it was usually sparked by a situation where they were just not feeling respected or acknowledged for all the work and energy they give. Luckily for most it was a fleeting thing that allowed them to voice their discontent and acknowledge their needs and desires.

The one that matters is you. Read more

Metamorphosis and Transformation Sometimes Looks Like “Stuckness”

Metamorphosis and Transformation Sometimes Look Like Stuckness

“Sometimes it seems as if nothing is happening in your life, like you are stuck, or being held back by some unknown force … when in fact REAL magic is afoot!” ~ Debbie Takara Shelor

 

Spirit: A Journey in Dance, Drums, and Song by Robert Mirabel

Robert-Mirabel-Spirit

Once someone has become “awake” and aware that they are a spiritual being having a human experience, they often go down various trails of belief or philosophy in order to understand their true Divine nature.

My awakening happened over 20 years ago in the midst of an intense life experience. I was jolted out of my spiritual slumber and forgetting who I am into full knowledge that there is significantly more to life than what I wear, my job title, the people I hang out with, or the things that I do. Life, and my purpose in experiencing it, are vastly deeper than that.

The first trail I went down was that of Native American spirituality and shamanism. I listened to native drumming, built medicine wheels, visited the Southwestern United States along with many other sacred locations, took endless shamanic journeys through meditation, did sweat lodges, mini vision quests, and learned to commune with nature.

Better put, I remembered how to commune. The truth is, the ability to connect with and “be” with nature is innate to all of us.

As I look back on my life, I realize this desire to understand the native people and their connection with earth, air, sky, and water started much earlier than that. In fact, growing up in Texas, whenever we played cowboys and Indians, I was ALWAYS an Indian. Somehow deep down, there has always been a “call” and a connection to the indigenous cultures of the world.

The more I spent time in meditation and learned to connect with animals, trees, flowers, stones, water, fire, etc., the more enhanced and fine-tuned my intuition became. That inner guidance system lead me to people and experiences that were far from ordinary. On several occasions, while walking down a trail in Sedona, Arizona, or at the womb spring in Chimayo, NM, or on a hike to the falls in Tesuque, New Mexico, I’ve had spontaneous past life memories of being native.

I married a man who lead people on sacred hikes in New Mexico and also sweat lodges on our property. Because of this, I was quite blessed to have Shaman and indigenous medicine people from all over the world spend time at my home, break bread at my table, share their wisdom over stories and laughter.

We used to have a copy of this video and often showed it to those who came to visit our home.

I was reminded recently of this video by Robert Mirabel of Spirit: A Journey in Dance, Drums, and Song. I began watching it and by the 3rd song, I was in tears. Something about this video just touches me on such a deep level there simply are no words. I trust you will enjoy it too!

Thank you Robert Mirabel for this incredible work of meaning and art.

Have a fabulous day,

Bestselling author Debbie Takara Shelor signature

Magnificent U Online – Soon to Begin

As I mentioned in the previous newsletter, I’ve spent the last several years “receiving” and developing several new teachings and technologies for healing, regaining harmony, balance, wholeness, and achieving your dreams. Its a massive upgrade to some of my earlier teachings including Freeway to Freedom and the profound transformation so many people have experienced with my various technologies over the years. It is taking everything to a whole new level. I also realized that since Stuart Wilde, my first teacher, is no longer with us, its time to share the powerful things I learned from him.

The training includes a deep dive into relationships, the things you are here to master, how to develop a deep and profound relationship with your Divine Self and the dolphins, greatly fine-tuning and amplifying your intuition so you know where to be, what to say, and what to do in every moment, clearing, energetic protection, and so much more.But before I finalize everything and put it out there, I have two questions for you:
  1. Would you like to start mid-November or would you like to wait until the beginning of January – after the holidays?
  2. If there is something specific you would like to learn about energy healing, becoming healed and whole, or any of the other topics I discuss, please let me know so I can include it in this training.
Please leave a comment below with your answers.
Thanks!