Wednesday, January 15, 2014

Lasting Friendships and Romantic Relationships Require Courage, Commitment, and a Fair Bit of Confidence

Growing and evolving into the person you want to be - the Magnificent U - requires that you "get real" with yourself and everyone else in your life. You learn to be authentic, honest, genuine, and real. That comes with a price though. That price is called vulnerability.

It takes courage, commitment, and a fair bit of confidence to speak about things that really matter. But being brutally honest without taking into consideration the potential emotional damage your words might cause to the "other" is selfish, unkind, and uncaring.

Speak honestly and truthfully with others - at all times. But do it as kindly and gently as possible - particularly when talking about things ...
that the other person might take wrong or personally.

People, for the most part, don't do well with criticism or having uncomfortable situations and conversation. They would prefer to avoid things like that.

When criticized, they often move into attack mode. Words that feel like finger pointing and accusations ruffle their feathers and they throw up the emotional armor shields, enter fight or flight mode, and get ready with angry words and fists on occasion.

However, the emotionally mature person, who is coming from a place of genuine love and appreciation of the person and deeply values the relationship, is not afraid to have uncomfortable conversations. They know that love and truth take relationships to a deeper place and they feel its worth it to get to the other side of whatever is temporarily uncomfortable in order to have something more meaningful and magnificent in the end.

Amazing things happen when you muster up the courage to talk openly, honestly, and kindly about mis-understandings or other issues that open you up to the potential of feeling rejected by the other person.. My willingness to do that has allowed me to develop and keep many deep and wonderful friendships.

When you can remain calm, clear, confident, and connected (the things I teach you how to achieve and maintain), you have an inner knowing about what to say, when to say it, and how to say it. Instead of reacting automatically with anger or sadness to the words or actions of another, you stay in neutral and respond with love. It definitely takes courage. But WOW is it worth it!

When you come from a place of truly loving and caring about another person and their feelings, and are willing to risk getting hurt yourself because of any potential backlash they might throw your way, they can feel that love and appreciation. And they do respond to it.

Everyone wants to feel loved, honored, accepted and appreciated for who they are.

Be the kind of friend or romantic partner you desire to have in your life.

Have a deLightful day,

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